EXPLETIVE DELETED NEIGHBORS!

 It comes as no surprise that my neighbors can be an irritant. Well, he can. She is pretty harmless. Crazy, but harmless.  They have a dog named Molly. Molly is like the black colored version of our dog, Sweetie. The only difference is that Sweetie has better owners.
There I was, dear readers, sound asleep in my bed when Manny's grumbling along with Martha telling him to be quiet. This, through not fault of hers, woke me up. That was when I discovered the source of Manny's agitation. It seems that Molly was outside barking at God knows what.
AT FIVE O'CLOCK IN THE FUCKING MORNING!!!
Jesus tells us that he only requires two things from us; One, that we believe that he is the one true way to God in Heaven and two, that we treat out neighbors as we ourselves would like to be treated. I'm pretty sure that we never left the dog on the porch to bark incessantly at absolutely nothing.
Part of the problem is that the IHS building across the street causes an echo to every sound nearby. So, when she barks, she hears a bark.
It's kind of like that Disney movie, Brother Bear where the two rams argue with their own echo. Funny, just not five AM funny.
So, I did what any reasonable person would do.
Oh, wait.
No, I didn't.
I put on my super cool lounge pants filled with words like 'Werewolf' and 'House of the Monster' all over them and a plain white t-shirt, you know the kind with the pocket and a pair of slippers and went downstairs. I grabbed by Navy blue Peacoat and went out to the treacherous driveway.
I waited patiently, it wasn't all that long, for Molly, who was sitting on their front porch, to bark.
I then shouted at the top of my lungs for her to shut up.
She barked, I shouted.
At first she responded, but eventually the tone in my voice told her to shut it.
If you know me I am capable of being very loud. Especially in a cold, December morning before dawn.
Hold on a second.
Okay, just wanted to check the temperature. It's 31 degrees outside and she is on a porch that is elevated fro the ground. With her thick coat I'm sure she's not cold. Just wanted to see if I should call animal control. Apparently not.
Anyway, where was I?
So, now I am wide awake. The dog seems to be quiet. Maybe they took her inside? No idea and don't care.
So, those two things that Jesus told me? Yeah, I'm good on the first one. Still working on the second one. Maybe I was helping my other neighbors on the street from the noise the dog was making?
Yeah, I'm going with that one.
I'm going to have a lovely cup of Italian roast coffee now.
Have an excellent day.